08 - Sometimes We Wake Up and We Already Wish We Could Go Back to Bed and Try Again Tomorrow

Running Song of the Day:

It’s always cool to listen to a song that came out 28 years ago that talks about malls being giant empty shells, suburban sprawl, and how consumerism buys us a moment of fleeting happiness that is ultimately poisoned with sorrow.

Cool! So this feeling has just been going on for like thirty years now. Cool cool cool.

Today’s Run:

Didn’t want to run today. Woke up, and knew I didn’t have it.

“Not having it” or looking into the mirror and saying “I just don’t have it today” or texting your best friend of 20 years saying “Yeah today I just don’t got it” isn’t necessarily a deal-breaker. It’s not the end of all things.

Not having it means that I couldn’t, say, go out and put everything I got on the line for a 50 mile run. Or try to go PR a 5k race. Not having it means today is maintenance mode. Cruise control. Lazy fuck shit. And that’s fine. That’s life, baby. A lot of life is just maintenance mode, for better or worse. Living like a half alive zombie boy, wishing that Tuesday would end already so that it could be Wednesday and we could watch Survivor.

(I will not apologize for my love of the unbelievably campy and melodramatic hit reality CBS tv show Survivor hosted by Jeff Probst.)

You don’t get days back in life. That’s the shitty part. You might not have it today (which is still fine) but “today” in this very specific instance isn’t coming back. It’s burned cash from a bank account with a very finite lump sum deposited.

We all, in one way or another know this. I’m not breaking new ground here. I feel like it’s just good to acknowledge it sometimes.

Anyway—you can not have it today and still get some shit done today. You can burn those energy reserves, or coffee-up a little more, or shirk some responsibilities to make more room for yourself to get something done. I’m not here to tell you how to do things. I’m just tellin’ ya what I do.

And today, I woke up, and I didn’t have it. But I knew I’d go and run 10k anyway.

Cold out. Feels like 32°. That’s ice temp baby.

Didn’t know what to wear exactly, so threw on a long sleeve shirt and shorts, running gloves and dumb running hat.

Bad kit. Wind really filleted me the entire run. Felt like shit.

The entirety of the run I was consciously telling myself “take it easy, cruise these miles” over and over. I didn’t check my watch at all until I was near the end of the run, and that was just to make sure I was on track to hit 10k by the time I got home. Pace didn’t matter today, only mileage. Get those miles.

Here’s me getting some of those miles while just absolutely not having it today:

Get those miles.

6.28 miles
in
1:06:14
so it was
5.7mph on avg
with
591 ft of vert
and i’ve run
55.83 miles this Spring